Wandering into your Wisdom; Unexpectedly fruitful directions

This is how we love ourselves forward

"Oh, you’ll know the way," she said as if I knew her and knew exactly where I was headed, both of which I did not. I walked on, puzzled by this bizarre interaction but interested in my desire to agree.

I walked past a playground and remembered a life lived uninhibited. I wondered if I wanted to swing. My answer was clouded by my ego’s fear of letting go enough to walk in and sit on a swing. I could only sense that I didn’t want to, but I think my ego was too loud. I wondered how long it had declined on my introverted behalf.

“OH, HI!” I heard someone shouting, pulling me out of my thoughts. I looked to the left, away from the playground, to see an older child, almost a teen, looking at me intently. I felt my face form a puzzled expression as I tried to determine if it was them who spoke. They started walking towards me as if they were about to speak again.

“You walked past it, but most do, not realising until it is too far to go back. Keep going this way now.”

“What did I walk past?” I asked.

“Pure Wonder and Discovery. You can find it if you go into the playground. I noticed you didn’t. So, just keep going. I have begun walking past it, too. You will find Inner Turmoil and Self-Questioning on the next part of the path. I have spent more and more time there lately.”

“Oh,” I said, my mind racing to catch up with the unexpected advice. I wasn’t sure what to make of that.

I stood stunned for too long, and I could see it caused awkwardness, to which they suddenly blurted out, “Sorry, I’ve gotta run now. Bye.”

“Bye,” I said, not knowing where to place all that. I wandered on.

The playground was now many blocks back, and I found myself amongst a cluster of quaint boutique shops. The shops nestled against each other as if whispering. I wanted to know what they were whispering about and found myself in a shop facing a large mirror. There I am. Is that me? Oh, yes, it is.

“Who do you see?” asked the male shop assistant in a gentle voice that left me in the moment, wondering what I saw beyond the reflection. The edges of me were rimmed with a Pursuit of Things that faded towards my centre to an Inner Slowing.

“Just me, I guess.” And there it was, the feeling of that transition from pushing forward to finding space.

“That is all you ever need to be. The reflection takes me forward in a way that carries the strength of what is behind me. Understanding this helps us love ourselves forward.”

“Love myself forwards?” I said, pondering how powerful that was.

“Yes, this place of Reassessing and Reflecting helps us do that. Here, you find a bit more acceptance of what is and isn’t. As you leave the shop, what you are working towards is around the corner.”

“Thank you,” I said more sincerely, from a knowing deep within as if this was all somehow normal.

I left the shop and walked around the corner, only to wander out of the shopping area and toward a stream. A path hugged the stream, beckoning me along, injecting me with wonder and a sprinkle of discovery. The babbling of the water captivated me, and I was lost in it for an unknown amount of time, meandering along.

A garden bench came into view. I made my way over and took a seat. I had arrived at a deep inner peace from all the noise in my head this day had pulled away. There was no worry about tomorrow or regret of yesterday. There was no need to be something or an avoidance of any part. I was simply, purely me. I had found a way to love myself forward with all that was.

While I didn't know where I was going today, my wisdom led me. I walked into a place that led me to a space deep within.

Yes, this is where I am meant to be.

Not somewhere out there, but this place in here, the strength within.

~

All photos are my own, taken in Tasmania Australia.