Anger and Fear; notes from Sarah Blondin's Course
Notes from the The Deepest Self Course by Sarah Blondin
“I am not immune to pain - nor to the joy coming to set me free.”
Sarah Blondin
I am doing my best to live with my anger. The strains of toddler parenthood; the noise and the verbal challenges leave me on shaky ground some days. I have never felt so human as I have as a parent. I love it for that, but that love comes with some versions I would rather be easier tamed in me.
Anger, as talked about in
’s Deepest Self Course on Insight Timer, takes us to what we need to learn, to what we need to release. It is also a hair away from our sorrow, our overwhelm and our tenderness. All in all, it is an exaggerated, inflated representation of our fear, of our heartache.When I am angry, I am scared.
Scared of what? Something that is pulling me away from the present moment, something from long ago, perhaps. Can I call forth my peace to replace this?
Who I am in this moment can change. I can see my resistance as I try to embrace that. I can see the well-worn path to hold me in the anger, the fear coming with the lock to pin me down here.
I can practice, when calm, how I will try in the heated moment to accept and love myself as I came to be; to ground myself in the now and practice allowing in an airing of old settings. I can practice sitting here in this, and that will lessen the grip anger takes.
I can shed the belief that this is me. This is a passing emotion. I will feel trampled in the moment, but simply showing up in that moment can begin to carve a path out of the old ways we carry.
Afterwards, own it. Write about it, listen to it, move in memory of it - simply walk to begin to dislodge its hold.
Pour love on all the pieces of this that came about to protect you when you needed it. But carrying anger forward won’t protect you. You will protect you. You have you. You always have and that is how you have always made it through.
You have you.
See my previous post for more notes from this great Course by Sarah on Insight Timer.